Ember numbers on my clock tell me its 3:00am

I am laying right next to you
watching your chest rise and fall to the beat of my heart
yet when I close my eyes
it feels like we are separated by oceans

Why do you keep coming back
to taunt me with your Conditional love and half truths?
cruelly waving what I am starved for in my face

Giving me false hope
with your fingers running through my hair
only loving me between my legs every few days

The only way to hold on
is with faded memories that fall from my eyes like anchors
keeping me just steady enough
to weather the next wave of pain that comes
with looking into your pale blue eyes

Not seeing myself in them anymore
only a reflection of her

8/24/2013