My sweet kitty

My baby Bowie,

you came to me at a time in my life when I really needed unconditional love, I was hurting. I remember seeing your picture on Facebook for the first time, I instantly knew I wanted to be your mom. I could tell by your cheeky grin that you would fit right in with our hodgepodge family of rescues. The first night in your new home you refused to sleep anywhere but on my chest, with your nose touching mine. You followed me everywhere. Even to places that I didn’t want you to, like the toilet. I’ll never forget the way you would look into my eyes and touch my cheek as if to say, it’s going to be okay mom, I love you. You were so much more than I ever expected you to be and I know that some people might think he was just a cat but to me you were a positive constant, a pain killer and that extra bit of light on my dark days. I love you my baby Bowie. Thank you for loving me and our family. I sure wish we could have had you in our lives a bit longer.

Goodbye my sweet friend

When my mom called me the night before last to tell me that my friend Tiffanie passed away, it felt like my breath was instantly sucked out of my lungs. My chest was heavy and I got quite, I didn’t cry right away. My mind instantly flooded with memories of her and I was in disbelief for a good ten minutes. I hung up with my mom and went straight to her Facebook and then I knew for sure she was gone. Her page was encumbered with condolence posts to her husband and two children.

I had an overwhelming sense of guilt because I didn’t keep in contact with her like I should have. Tiffanie was one of the first friends I made when I moved to Arizona. My mom used to be her boss and thought Tiffanie would be a good friend for me. I was shy and awkward and Tiffanie was the complete opposite. The first time we went out together she took me to a party and we both got pretty drunk. I ended up falling asleep at this guys house and somehow the journal that I carried in my purse ended up being written in by Tiffanie and some other random people that I met that night. I was a little weirded out at the time but I’m glad that I have these little letters from her. We ended up at a road side taco stand at about 3:30 am and then finally back at my apartment.

She was always pushing me to open up more but she made sure to look out for me too, She was protective. One thing that always stuck out to me about her was her ability to look at life like it would never be shitty for her, because she wouldn’t let it be. She was determined to be happy and she was. She finished everything she set out to do with excitement. Her laugh was contagious and her smile warm. I will miss her, I just wish I had the chance to say goodbye.

I was two upset to write about any of this the other night. I have a lot floating around in my head lately and I was already feeling emotional before I got the news about Tiffanie. I’m tired now and I still have to cook dinner.

Goodnight, Mandy ❤️